Chimmi Lhakhang or Chi Bum Lhakhang?
Ours is a land where folks believe that horses lay eggs and tigers fly. So anything is possible in a place like Bhutan. Me being me, I have always been cynical of such beliefs. I mean I listened when our Masters told us to seek logic instead of adhering to blind faith in the supposed magic. I will get to the logic bit later.
But despite all my cynicism, I have always had no objections against the philandering Master Drukpa Kuenley and his outrageous ways. Let me not stuff you with repeated information about his origins and his deeds which is mostly copy-pasted stuff…..trust me, they don’t pay much attention to the actual detail….basically they just know him for his holy roving phallus….but here’s where I had yet another thought….why do they ALWAYS keep referring to his Holy Dong as the ‘Thunderbolt of Wisdom?’ I mean it’s repeat stuff in it? And it’s become awfully bland…I say let’s pay the Holy Dong it’s due and come up with better references. The Rod of Redemption, Destroyer of Uranus, Lance of Singularity, Eggplant of Wisdom, are a few fresh references that come to mind but let’s not get distracted here.
He is the one religious saint that I totally and unequivocally agree with. His unconventional approach towards enlightenment involved EVERYTHING besides hunkering down with a mantra in a remote cave, as was and as remains the standard norm. Armed with his highly versatile phallus, he was hardly a paragon of virtue. It is said that he fornicated with the demonesses and ripped them apart with his enormous Holy Dong, which he possessed the magical prowess to enlarge at will. As much as I wouldn’t have enjoyed being a recipient of the renowned phallus, I do enjoy listening to and reading about his colorful exploits which usually come thick and fast, and often with a generous portion of ribaldry. He used his phallus upon anything that had a hole, sparing not even his own birth mother, but at least in her case he didn’t go through with the actual fornication process.
A certain western blogger was so impressed by the way our Drukpa Kuenley wielded his phallus against evil demons, nuns and old women alike that he has gone to the extent of declaring him ‘The Original Gangsta of Tantra,’ which I feel is quite apt. There are a couple of anecdotes that remain etched in popular psyche. But the one that I like the most is the bit where he prostrated towards a chunk of gold instead of the presiding lama during a public blessing, maintaining that had it not been for the gold, he wouldn’t have been fortunate enough to receive the lama’s blessing. Initially he hadn’t been allowed to even approach the lama as he had nothing to offer by way of ‘Wang Nyen’ (*basically an offering made as a gesture of gratitude for the blessings conferred*), which, by the way, was a default setting in him owing to his total disregard for any and all material wealth, as opposed to the other lamas who didn’t quite share his opinion.
Earlier on, I mentioned that our people don’t pay much attention to detail….that they are more than happy to take resort to copy-pasting information. Now let me make my point. The so called fertility temple at Lobesa, which is associated with him, has come to be known as ‘Chimmi Lhakhang’ Punakha and people have interpreted it as ‘Chi Med’ Lhakhang. They have offered two explanations. One – the ‘Temple of No Death,’ because Drukpa Kuenley was the only person who is said to have managed to run away from Death. Here the ‘Chi’ has been understood as an abbreviation of ‘Chiwa Mitakpa’ or ‘Death.’ This bit kinda makes sense as there hasn’t been a single reincarnation of Drukpa Kuenley till date. I mean, how can you be reincarnated if you haven’t died in the first place? Bit of a logic there.
The second and more popular explanation is the one where they interpret the ‘Chi’ bit as ‘Dog.’ The name translates as ‘No Dog Temple,’ in keeping with the very popular anecdote of how Drukpa Kuenley managed to subdue the demoness of Semtokha even after she transformed into a dog to get away from him. Now THIS is the bit that I have a problem with. I mean, even a very ordinary person can kill/subdue a single dog….it is not a very extraordinary feat.
Contrary to popular explanation, the name of the temple (*according to the locals who actually know*), is supposed to be ‘Chi Bum’ Lhakhang. Here again the ‘Chi’ is a reference to a dog, but the latter bit – ‘Bum,’ which means a ‘hundred thousand’ is the part that lends logic. The demoness is supposed to have manifested as a hundred thousand dogs, despite which, Drukpa Kuenley, through this superior spiritual accomplishments, managed to chain them all together and pin them underneath the black stupa outside the temple. Infact, THAT stupa is supposed to be the main element of sacred significance in the temple premises. By any stretch of the imagination, this bit makes much more sense doesn’t it? An ordinary person wouldn’t be able to kill/subdue that many dogs at one go would he? I know that ‘a rose by any name does smell just as sweet’ but in cases like these, people have to know…they have to be given proper perspective. Hence my efforts at seeking an alternative point of view.
In any case, Drukpa Kuenley’s ways of finding mirth in the mundane, his stabbing truths and his brutally honest wisdom about pretentiousness and lameness in the real world are known to have always entertained if not enlightened our folks. He knew a heck of a lot of ways of generating awareness and exposing pretentiousness (*which, let’s admit, we have a lot of these days*). All his ways were of the ‘in-your-face’ type to say the least. His memory is eternal. He lives in every phallus that is painted on our walls or carved into wood, protecting us from evil, dispelling ignorance and providing a source of income to whoever is fond of carving out the most ludicrous phalluses they can.
